My perspective changed from “Dad’s disease only brings me misery” to “Dad’s disease is the driving force for my graduate studies.”

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What happened?

 

My father underwent a kidney transplant from his sister in the 1990s. Of the two patients the doctor operated on that day, only my father survived. It was such an unusual case that it was reported to the medical community for research purposes. The miracle of my father’s survival didn’t just bring me happiness; it also brought baggage for the whole family. I found it painful to try to understand my father’s nervousness about his condition, as we all ate a bland diet. Dad couldn’t run or do anything strenuous with his left arm. He had to take medicine three times a day at a fixed time, take blood tests, and have a monthly checkup. I never went on a family trip, because there was so much we had to be careful about. Thirty years later, this is still the situation.

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One day, when my resentment was growing faster than the pleasant memories, my father left the house unusually early in the morning. Dad typically sits in front of his lab desk every morning. At that time, he had time to focus entirely on his research. In addition to his research, he regularly bought meals for students who live far from home, talking with them about their school life or concerns. Although his illness must have caused him severe pain, he never let go of his work or made his family endure financial difficulties. He always supported other people in their difficulties. I realized that I had never tried to understand his feelings. Having found it difficult to endure in accomplishing a goal, and being hesitant to challenge myself, I learned diligence and caring. I also learned patience from my father, who endured pain for about thirty years.

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After that, I began to swim and climb steadily, and like my father, I have a passion to do my best in my field of study. In this process, I developed the belief that I have to always look at others. My father is a professor in the Department of Early Childhood Education and mentors early childhood teachers. He continues to meet with students who have graduated. Early childhood teachers in South Korea do not have a long period of service. Watching my dad listen and give emotional support to struggling early childhood teachers in the field, I gained a belief that I should also always focus on the experiences of teachers as a researcher who can understand their voices.